“The Fine Line of Anger”
God created us with many emotions to express ourselves, encourage others, motivate, and have compassion. Having emotions is not sinful, but our actions evoked by our emotions might be.
I have heard some people say that being angry is a sin. If that were true, wouldn’t sadness or happiness also be a sin? Think about the person who feels sad, listens to the enemy’s lies, and lives in despair instead of gratefulness. Or someone full of cheer, drinking to get drunk and making fun of others or causing them to hurt. Our emotions of sadness, happiness, or anger are not when we sin. It is what we do as soon as we feel sad, happy, or angry.
Ephesians 4:26 says, “Be ye angry, and sin not.” When we are angry, we must assess why and what God wants us to do. If our anger is unmerited and for a selfish reason, we would avoid sin if we repent immediately and ask God for direction. But sometimes, anger is a motivator. If you see a bully picking on someone weaker, does that make you angry? You haven’t sinned by getting angry, but what will you do about it?
The Holy Spirit motivates us. He empowers us. He counsels us. If we are living in God’s will, hearing His voice, when something makes us angry, we are more apt to do something positive than not.
Anger is a secondary emotion that feeds from another emotion. That tells us it takes more time to get angry than it takes to be happy or sad. Anytime I feel anger, it is usually because I am hurt first. When I am hurt, if I go to the Lord first, I might avoid getting angry and acting on that anger. But if I have pent-up hurt I shoved inside, I might feel angry quickly because I never addressed what hurt me.
How many ‘little things’ turn into big things because we shoved them under a rug? I think they call this passive-aggressive – when someone holds in hurtful feelings because they hate confrontation. They would rather keep the peace. They haven’t practiced the healthy skills of boundary setting and assertiveness.
When we fear what people will think, instead of rightfully taking our place in the Kingdom – as King’s kids, we will be led to sin even if we believe we are doing the right thing by keeping the peace, by putting another first – things we misunderstood in the Bible’s teachings. Yes, I am to love my neighbor as myself – but I am to care for myself too.
God created our bodies to heal themselves for the most part. We see God’s excellent design through science and biology. We cannot ignore the healing of our minds. God wants us to care for our temple – where His Holy Spirit resides. That means, when someone (even a church member or a good friend) asks more of us than we can give, we must not push our feelings inside and allow hurt and anger to set in.
We’ll talk more about this in tomorrow’s “The Thrive.”